Profile Hints and Tips

1. Profile Pictures 

 

First impressions are important, especially when we are looking to make that first connection with someone who we hope will become a significant part of our future. So, having a good first photo is really crucial.  

 

2. Pictures – Please Don’t: 

 

• Don’t try to hide behind anything - sunglasses, hats or partly covered facial features are not advised  

• Don’t pose as part of a group, as this can be confusing to other users - especially if it’s your only uploaded photo.  

• Don’t use pictures where children feature either with you or as part of the background – even if they are your own. 

• Don’t use provocative pictures, that show you half naked or in minimal clothing. This is a proven turn off and likely to damage your dating prospects. 

• Don’t use pictures that might cause any level of controversy i.e. those containing guns, knives, drug use, swearing or any other behaviour that could be deemed as inappropriate to our members. 

 

Please remember that above all, REDDI is a respectful community. 

 

3. Pictures – Please Do: 

 

• Use a recent, head and shoulders shot of you, preferably taken in natural light. 

• Use unfiltered images. We want to create meaningful, honest and open connections that are based on genuine people, so please only upload pictures that show your true, up-to-date likeness.  

• Show your personality. If you’re a happy, upbeat person, then try to show it. These are the things people will be looking for, making you more attractive to the people you are trying to find. 

• Use multiple pictures. Try to back up your main photo with a couple more options, so that prospective connections get a more complete idea of who you are. 

 

4. Your Profile Bio 

 

What you write in your bio is key to letting people know who you are and what you're all about. It can be the springboard for those crucial opening conversations, too. 

 

You have to think of your profile as your relationship CV. Spend some time writing about the things you love and what sums you up. Writing too little can give the impression that finding a prospective partner is not important to you, so try to put some thought into it – show that you care, and that you’re serious. 

 

Three paragraphs that roughly outline what you enjoy doing, what inspires you, maybe a little bit about where you come from or anything else that you feel would be interested to the kind of person you want to meet. 

 

We know that it can be tempting to airbrush your profile in order to attract more prospective connections - but we value honesty and integrity above all else here at REDDI, so please don't say anything you can't back up later on.  Don't misrepresent your height, for example, as it will only cause awkwardness if you decide to meet in person later down the line. 

 

5. Opening Lines 

 

What’s the best way to start a conversation, once you’ve connected with someone? 

 

The key is to ensure that you’ve read their profile. Within it (if it’s of good quality), there should be lots to talk about.  

 

Don’t forget that you’re trying to engage with another human being. Think how you’d like to be approached by a prospective partner. Ask non-invasive but thoughtful, open questions to set the tone, then for a normal, relaxed conversation. 

 

Always make it an original message to that person – please don’t cut and paste. Your first message is your elevator pitch and your big chance to make a good impression that will hopefully lead to a great connection.  Still stuck? Try, some basic paragraph starts below:

 

• Hey, I really liked your profile.  I see we share similar values, so I wondered if you'd like to chat?

• Hey, you're profile really stood out for me, I liked the bit about....... 

• Hey, you sound great and happy we connected.  Would love to chat more, hope you feel the same.

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6. Ending (not Ghosting) Conversations 

 

Here at REDDI we value not wasting each others time, and respecting when maybe you're just not right for each other.  This however, is a two way process with both parties being rather grown up about it.  That starts with not ghosting someone, and it ends by no one taking it personally.  Generally, you should  bear in mind the following when ending an online conversation:

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• Be polite - just because you're never going to see this person, doesn't mean you have a free pass to be rude or obnoxious. 

• Be firm - make it clear that you have made a decision to end your online conversation.

• Don't give false hope - your message should be conclusive, don't leave people hanging.

• Accept that you have no control over their reaction - most people will accept your decision with easy, however, a small majority may react badly expressing sadness or disappointment.  There is not much you can do about this.  If however, they choose to send abusive or offensive messages it maybe wise to block and report them. 

 

As we begin to add extra features, you will notice that we have been quite intentional when it comes to helping people not waste time - with features such as 5 day match drop, 5 person limit on who you can message at anyone time, therefore we have built in some suggested 'endings' should you feel that you no longer want to pursue the connection. In the meantime, if you don't know what to say, feel free to use any of the below:

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• Hey, it has been really nice chatting and I think you are great.  However, I don't think we are a suitable match long-term, and as I know your time is as valuable as mine I just wanted to be upfront.  I wish you all the best in your search.

• Hey, thanks for connecting.  It was fun getting to know you.  I've met someone else who I think is a good fit and I'm moving forwards with them.  I wish you all the best. 

• Hey, really appreciate the opportunity to get to know you.  However, I don't think we have much in common and I'm not interested in pursuing this any further.  Wishing you the best. 

• Hey, I'm so sorry but something has come up in my life and I just feel I do not have the time right now to focus getting to know someone.  I wish you the best.

• Hey, I feel like we are on different paths and have different needs when it comes to the relationship we want.  All the best.  

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You can read more tips on effective online dating by visiting the REDDI Blog.